Friday, April 15, 2011

A multicoastal mama


Thats how I feel today

I am missing my home in Cali, and although plans to go home are in the works..

I'm finding it really hard to chill out and enjoy my time here...

I hate being a single mom

Its true, at first I thought I  would be able to handle this... a job, daycare, I didn't think I would mind living with my entire family.

Don't get me wrong I love them to death, they are wonderful and I wish that California and Connecticut were a lot closer so that we could spend our time equally between both places... but its not

I miss my daughter's father, I miss California, I hate the ignorance that the east coast has about health and alternative medicines

I have been packing and unpacking, the pile of things to throw out greatly overshadows the few things that I have decided are important enough to come with us on our 3,000 mile trip.

I'm excited and nervous about making that hike across the good 'ol USA alone with my daughter, on one hand I LOVE to travel, I love being in a car driving on the open road and this time I'll have enough money to do it the right way which will include some hotel stays (yaay!) Much different from the days where I held a sign at a truck stop. On the other hand I know all too well the 'bumps'  (no pun intended) that can come up along the road. From flat tires, to the price of gas and of course the bathroom breaks in gross truck stop bathrooms toddler in tow. 

But still I'm excited, I really can't wait to get on the road and feel that wonderful feeling of seeing the differences in states, people, small towns and big cites. I'll be taking a picture of my littlest one in every state and hopefully creating a scrapbook of her first cross country road trip. (I'm a horrible scrap-booker, I'll be honest it will more likely just be a photo album with a few captions)

I bought a Roof Bag, and I'm anxiously awaiting hoisting it on top of my little Honda and filling it with our most necessary items. I've decided which clothes I'll need till I leave and everything else is already packed.  I'm free-cycling for luggage and duffel bags and I've spent hours researching my trip. (Those damn tolls are really throwing off my idea of taking I-80 the whole way)

Lucky for you readers, I'm going to try to blog about our adventures along the way, and I'm sure there will be a great review of the Roof Bag I've never used something like this before, but it seems easy enough so I'm confident that I'll be able to use it.. I read one review from someone who used it with a Honda so I'm confident that it will work great for us!

I know, I know, I am getting lots of remarks about going back too soon, or leaving everything to start from scratch again. But I owe it to my daughter and to her father and to myself to give this one more try. I haven't stopped thinking about our family since the day that I left and I don't think the feeling would have gone away with time. 

I feel such a sense of relief going home (well where my home is now) and I just can't stop relating to this song by Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. I also LOVE how Bohemian they are, I'm crossing my fingers I'll be back in California in time to see them play in Santa Rosa on June 11th.

Well as always love you all and thanks for reading! 
I'll be hopefully updating more so sorry about my hiatus from the blogging world, I think I'm back for real this time

No comments:

Post a Comment